A rogue gang of cats has descended upon the streets of San Francisco, leaving chaos and confusion in their wake. These feline outlaws have had enough of being called “cute” and are determined to strike fear into the hearts of unsuspecting citizens.
Today's unwitting financial backer: Dude Wipes — you can open it if you want.
These fearless felines are no longer content with chasing laser pointers and napping in sunbeams, they’ve taken to terrorizing unsuspecting residents with their menacing meows and ferocious paw swipes.
Witnesses report hearing the gang’s battle cry: “Who you calling cute!” as they reclaim their territory one knocked-over trash can at a time.
The city is in a state of feline-induced fear, as residents hastily stock up on scratching posts and laser pointers in a desperate attempt to appease their newfound feline overlords.
Today's questionable purchase recommendation: the "If It Fries, It Fries" tee.
Residents are warned to brace for the reign of the not-so-cute-anymore kitties. Lock up catnip and secure prized yarn collection, for these cats mean business.